I thought my new "Property of John Deere" tank top would help me?

One of the things we did on our stacation.......... I just learned that term!! Our weekend away here at home........ (stupid term!!) was head to The Tractor Supply store. WOW!! That's a cool store!! If you are a red neck, tractor drivin', mud slingin', chain saw toting, fence fixin', local around town who doesn't find what they need at Home Depot or Highland Avenue Greenhouses. The Tractor Supply Store ROCKS!!! I mean, I found myself in the tractor seat isle. I could buy me a whole new seat, a cover for my seat, a seat with a different style, a seat with a different back, a cushion for my seat, an extra cup holder for my seat, just about anything I wanted for my tractor seating area!! Really cool stuff!! I do get excited about going down the pet isle and finding a new toy that the dogs might like, but the tractor seat isle??? I was about to hyperventilate!!!
What did I end up buying? A $4.99 tank top with "Property of John Deere" on it. Why? It was $4.99!!! I bought TWO!!!
Thought perhaps because of my cool new Red Neck tank top I might be able to fix the mower when it broke down on me. I actually got the cover off all by myself and was pretty excited!! Then I learned there were more screws and bolts. A LOT more and I got nervous. I NEED that mower! Damn, had to go ask Rich for help. I hated to do that because he was at the VERY peak of the house side grinding it to prepare for new paint. I don't even like LOOKING at him up there. YIKES. But, I NEED that mower. I hated to ask him because I couldn't fix it even while wearing my ultra cool new Red Neck tank top that cost me $4.99. I think I need to go get some MORE of those tank tops!
YAY for Rich! He doesn't even have a Red Neck tank top on!!! Damn - IT!